A Southeastern US Epic Adventure: Day 1…Sort of
A Fairy Princess, A Near Death Experience, Lost Treasure and Someone Gets Married.
The plan was to leave around 5pm on Friday and for the first time in my 13 year stint being involved with my wife; I had no realistic expectation of sticking to the plan. Yep, I had finally learned my lesson. You see, my dear sweet darling of a bride has rarely shared my propensity for schedules…especially when on vacation.
Of the few things that irritate me about her, this is the only one that makes me want to stab something with a taco fork. You know the kind of irritation I’m talking about. The type that actually makes you feel as if you can crush cars with your bare hands or throw farm animals long distances…yeah, you know what I’m talking about.
If the truth be known, I can’t even blame her for the delay on this particular trip anyway. Due to a business related matter (how un-loafer like of me, right?) I made the call to delay our departure until Saturday morning…which in all reality, became Saturday afternoon. It’s probably a good thing I have come to peace with never leaving at the scheduled time, huh?
So, on Saturday after 1pm and we were finally heading out on our trip. The wife, the fairy princess (more on her later) and I were taking another road trip…with multiple stops. Stops that included Calloway Gardens in Central Western Georgia, Helen Georgia in Northeastern Georgia (which cracks me up since we lived 7 miles from there before moving to Florida….I mean, who vacations where they used to live unless they were one of the characters at Disney World) and Ashville North Carolina.
We arrived in Pine Mountain, Georgia (where Callaway Gardens is located) just before dark. Rather than bore you with road weary details, I think a bullet list would suffice. So, here it is:
- Had two requests for potty breaks 45 miles from any town or building that had indoor toilets.
- Fairy Princess picked her nose to the point of bleeding, not once but 3 times. By the way, the fairy princess is our five year old, wide eyed, and talkative sweetheart of a little girl and other than this nose picking episode, is a perfect kid. (not just saying that because she is my daughter)
- Once we arrived at our first destination, the Hotel (Days Inn Pine Mountain Georgia) attempted to charge me 20 bucks more than the price listed on their website.
- After finally checking into the Crappy Days Inn, as I’ll refer to it for the remainder of my life, I had to make 3 trips to various retail outlets for food, drinks and other various items that were still sitting on a counter in Miramar Beach Florida.
- We generally like eating at non-chain style establishments when we travel. No hope for that around here, KFC was the closest thing to local fare we could find that didn’t have 3 dogs sitting next to the tables begging for food.
- Positive note: I did find a moderately decent selection of craft beer and also learned that since moving away from Georgia, the restrictions on Sunday alcohol sales seemed to have loosened a bit. Yippee for debauchery!